What follows are some words posted by the Lanky Wonder himself on his former message board, which we shall never speak of again.
Ideally, I hope to be able to offer you more of Matt's words in the future. You see, I have a few months of private investigator training under my belt (not to mention last night's fried chicken), and while I had to cut it short, there were two things I learned: 1) just because you're wearing a trench coat doesn't mean you don't have to wear pants, and 2) how to go through garbage. So rest assured that if Matt tosses out any shopping lists or reminders to catch MTV's Undressed, you'll read about it here first.